Cloverfield: Blockbuster about a giant monster that a hype-tastic marketing campaign kept in secret and shadow. Spoiler: It’s not a lion.

One Missed Call: J-Horror remake in which you get a phone call from your future, dying self. Then you die. Spoiler: Ed Burns‘ career got this call before cell phones were even invented.

Charlie Wilson’s War: Movie about senator Charlie Wilson’s crusade in the 1980’s to fund the Mujahideen’s war against the Soviet government in Afghanistan. Spoiler: Things in Afghanistan are still pretty bad.

What Would Jesus Buy: Documentary about marketing and commercialization in American culture. Spoiler: It turns out what Jesus would buy is this.

Also on DVD this week: the Savages, the Orphanage, Hannah Takes the Stairs, Nina’s Heavenly Delights, Romulus, My Father, Starting Out in the Evening, Trailer Park Boys: The Movie, and the Walker.